Humorous, disturbing, provocative: Pakistani blogger declares the top five sexiest Pakistani terrorists.
5. Ajmal Kasab: “…a veritable Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys from our part of the world.”
4. Masood Azhar: “He is, simply put, one of the most passionate and hair-raising public speakers I have ever heard.’
3. Brahamdagh Bugti: “Brahamdagh’s sex appeal is quite conventional – he is a man’s man. Rugged mountain dweller, he has been in hiding for two years, ever since our beloved Army murdered his grandpa.”
2. Ahmed Omar Saeed Sheikh: “Ahmed Omar Saeed also exudes power, another turn on: apparently he used to phone Musharraf from his jail cell threatening him with attacks if he did not release him.” (true story)
1. Hakeemullah Mehsud: “Hakeemullah is your typical Pathan – tall, handsome, charmingly rustic. Never has a man looked hotter in that winter cap that he constantly adorns (someone should tell him summer’s just ending).”
And words of advice for the rest of us:
For my non-desi readers, if any: all links are in Urdu. If you don’t know the language, learn it. Pakistan is the most important country in the world, according to the Americans, so you might do well to learn the national language, ahem ahem.
Buzz 6:51 pm on November 30, 2009 Permalink |
Possibly the most homoerotic thing I have read on TI.
(Not that there is anything wrong with that…)
johnpi 12:16 am on December 1, 2009 Permalink |
LOL.
The blogger who wrote that identifies Deobandi. Perhaps he’ll stop by and explain himself. I would recommend that in the future he sign his blog posts “heterosexually yours, in a chaste and Islamically appropriate way” just to clear up in any potential confusion.
On a more serious note, I was struck by this comment the blogger made, “…I realized that there is no such list for, you know, men of chaos. They do, after all, have mass appeal.”
He’s right. The dynamics that we understand to contribute to mass appeal in the Western media, including charisma and sexual appeal, are just as much at work elsewhere, and we’re lying to ourselves if we don’t admit it.
Also, we should acknowledge that in some deep psychologically satisfying ways these villains, as repulsive as their crimes might be, offer us a kind of empowerment. I recall reading somewhere that up until the 1950s, American blacks were not allowed to have any film roles in Hollywood that exhibited some form of power, ie, good guys or bad guys. Yes, the good guy always wins in the end, but the bad guys are potent and powerful too, and therefore blacks in Jim Crow America could not be allowed to hold significant roles on either side of the moral universe.
These Muslim terrorists have appropriated positions of power on the dark side, and in doing so they affirm the full range of our own human potential.
I suspect that if Osama bin Laden is ever captured, millions of Muslims who otherwise completely rejected his actions and ideas will struggle with complex feelings about seeing him humiliated and/or diminished by captivity.
Buzz 1:19 am on December 1, 2009 Permalink |
I remember there was a lot of sympathy expressed for Saddam after he was lured out of his spider hole. He went to his hanging pretty defiantly. Some muslims really admired him at that point. Whatever.
Maybe the blogger can start a teen Muslimah Tigerbeat mag staring all these hunky terrorists. Sort of a Waziristani paparazzo
Buzz 1:21 am on December 1, 2009 Permalink |
Mehsud’s favorite things are:
1. Pizza
2. futbol
3. Decapitations
Sohaib 2:36 pm on December 9, 2009 Permalink |
I am the blogger in question. And I would like to clarify that any homoeroticism is entirely unintentional.
And yes, “bad guys” do have power and thus exude charisma. Same is the case with terrorists. Though in Pakistan many consider them to be the good guys.
Buzz 4:12 pm on December 9, 2009 Permalink |
It was a funny piece which I hope you did with a bit of parody in mind even though I get that these people are heros to some.
The anti-hero is the hero these days.
Buzz 4:15 pm on December 9, 2009 Permalink |
Although with the taliban kiling pakistani women and children regularly, the charm may wear a little thin.
Taliban Dynamite Boys School in Pakistan
johnpi 7:10 am on December 10, 2009 Permalink |
lol. Great blog. Agree with the commenters there that said you should push the envelope like you did in this blog post more often.