Talk Islam

muse

  • 04:32:01 pm on July 20, 2008 | # | |
    Tags: , ,

    Why are Muslims divorcing? Some interesting comments at Suhaib Webb’s blog. I personally don’t think its necessarily a bad thing - sometimes divorce is the best option and divorcees shouldn’t be stigmatized.

     

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Comments

  • Willow 5:21 pm on July 20, 2008 | #

    I was more impressed by the answers than I thought I would be.

  • muhammad mushtaq 11:59 pm on July 20, 2008 | #

    i was more disgusted by the answers than i thought i would be.

    asinine question and worse answers.

  • muhammad mushtaq 12:01 am on July 21, 2008 | #

    2 straight posts where “necessarily” has been italicized.

  • aziz 5:49 am on July 21, 2008 | #

    there were some really insightful comments, agreed. I was particularly struck by this from “Frank Murphy”:

    The only contexts in which Muslims discuss such issues are da’wah (where Muslims often respond to legitimate gender-related questions from non-Muslims with evasive non-sequiturs) and academia (where the discussions are often theoretical and esoteric). The result is that people operate exclusively on the basis of their own assumptions. If we can’t be honest with ourselves about questions that will inevitably impact our lives in this country (e.g., Should we really regard patriarchy as un-Islamic? Should we really regard feminism as un-Islamic? What should 2:228 mean for us as Muslims in America?), then we shouldn’t be surprised when problems like divorce become endemic.

    emphasis mine. Awesome questions, each worthy of a thread in its own right.

  • muhammad mushtaq 12:43 pm on July 21, 2008 | #

    then there were the comments that divorces happen b/c of porn.

    american muslim genius at work.

  • Willow 1:52 pm on July 21, 2008 | #

    I was actually intrigued by that. Whether it causes divorce or not, a porn habit can’t be good for a marriage, and I thought it was interesting that so many women brought it up. (Along with the internet generally.)

  • muhammad mushtaq 10:53 pm on July 21, 2008 | #

    maybe the american muslimas should be given some sex ed instruction by female imams before marriage so they dont think that oral sex is haram.

  • Muse 1:13 pm on July 22, 2008 | #

    Why are women responsible not only for their own sexuality but also men’s? More oral sex = less porn? Doubt it.

  • Fatemeh 4:52 pm on July 22, 2008 | #

    Uh, something (common sense) tells me that Muslim women refusing to give oral sex isn’t what’s breaking up most marriages.

    I DO think that ALL Muslims (men AND women–some men seem to think that female pleasure is haram, while we’re on the topic) should have comprehensive sexual education before marriage. Aiming that statement only at Muslim women just isn’t fair.

  • muhammad mushtaq 5:08 pm on July 22, 2008 | #

    Why are women responsible not only for their own sexuality but also men’s.

    Because under standard principles of sexual chivalry/egalitarianism, Muslim men ar raised NOT TO ASK WOMEN FOR SEX.

    Maybe you could just get it on your wife without asking her back in the ‘homeland’ but in America Muslim men are trained to DEFER to the woman.

    With greater power comes greater responsibility.

    Either Muslimas should say: sex is the men’s purview (in which case the responsibility falls on him) or they should get with the program and turn their men on.

    Frankly, this isn’t all that strange a request. Christians and Jews have long understood that they need to counsel couples about sex (which means telling the women that they need to hook it up for their men and spice it up). Oprah even features some Jewish Rabbi who is all about helping women learn better mind tricks that will lead them to better turning on their men.

    Again, if this seems too tedious to you, you can always tell your man: you are in charge of my sex.

  • Spoony G 11:31 am on July 27, 2008 | #

    Muhammad Mushtaq:

    Quite hatting on everyone else and learn some tolerance. I felt the question at the other site was relevant.

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